Today would have been your 44th birthday. Even though I was coming to your grave site today, I didn’t realize until my conversation with Neicey that I was also coming to say goodbye. I woke up this morning and immediately started heading to your grave site. I listened to “One Last Cry” the entire way there as tears were coming from my eyes. They were not coming from a place of pain but from a place of closure. I could not get that at your home-going service because of all the foolishness I had to deal with that week.
Anyway, as I was crying I realized that I gave my best to you and you gave yours in return. Life is changing for me so much right now and I realize that was the reason for the tears. I had to say bye to our old life. Oh, remember those engagements I was turning down while you were in the hospital? Well, I’m being booked everywhere now. Things are coming at me so fast, but God has definitely sent adequate help. Unnia is helping/teaching me so much, both spiritually and about business. I wish you could have met her because you two would have been the best of friends, I promise. Oh, and she does not play that mess either. She will get with me quick, fast, and in a hurry. I’m always laughing when she calls herself “getting me straight” because she reminds me of you and the way you would say I need to do this or that. On another note, I now understand why you said some of the things you said to me over the years concerning if something were to ever happen to you. You knew I would need someone to help me take care of the me that I see in the mirror.
I UNDERSTAND THAT DREAM NOW
Also, I now understand why you said some of the things you said to me over the years concerning if something were to ever happen to you. You knew I would need someone to help me take care of the me that I see in the mirror. This brings me to Kudzie. I finally understand that dream now. Ann, she is everything you wanted for me. One thing you would love about here is that she forces me to take care of myself. I had to tell her I broke a bone but I was alright. She said, “YOU ARE NOT ALRIGHT, make sure you do this/that”. I remember how you would get on me about taking care of everyone else but myself, well Kudzie is on it. I can’t get anything past her. It’s like God is up there telling on me whenever I don’t take care of myself.
After you passed I was almost out of here too. I understand completely what that guy went through who passed not shortly after his wife. Your death was the first time I ever uttered the words “I Can’t”…. it was at that point that I no longer believed in myself and was ready to just drift away, but Kudzie would not allow it. You wanted me to love again and for that lady be able to give it back in return and take care of me… Ann, Kudzie is that lady, I’m 100% sure of it. She is absolutely gorgeous inside and out.
BECAUSE OF YOU
You once said that God must have put you here for others to know what not to be like, but you were absolutely wrong. I’m working on my farewell tribute to you and it’s going to be read by hundreds of thousands of people. Because of you women will know that they don’t have to settle for being liked when they can be loved. They will know that it’s okay to have standards and that they shouldn’t give themselves away to every man who says hi. It’s because of you that many women will know that they should NEVER let or turn a blind eye if a man cheats on them, hits them, or abuses them in any way. These ladies will know that true love is very real. They will know that it’s possible to marry and grow more in love instead of growing apart. You have changed the lives of so many people that you never got to meet.
ONE GLAD MORNING
After I left your grave site I was dancing in the car and the music got so good I pulled over and got out to get my boogie on. Cars were riding by but you know I don’t care about that. You would have been so embarrassed, AGAIN…… I just wanted to say HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! And, to let you know that you don’t have to worry about me now, I’m in good hands. I’m going to love her the way you wanted me to love her and live the life with her you wanted me to live. We’ll meet again in the sky… “One glad morning, when this life is over, I know I’ll see your face”… forever loved, forever missed.To every man who is reading this I ask you this: If your wife were to disapear today would you be left with great memories or great regret?... LOVE HER RIGHT WHILE YOU CAN. Click To Tweet
This post was originally wriitten and posted on Facebook April 14, 2019, Ann’s Birthday.